Bersikaplah dengan Baik Terhadap Anak-anak (Nasehat Rasulullah Muhammad Saww)

sikap-terhadap-anakOleh Arsalan Zibaî

Rasulullah Muhammad Saww (Shallalahu  ‘alaihi  wa  âlihi  wa  sallam) mewariskan sejumlah bimbingan dan nasehat terkait dengan sikap dan perilaku terhadap anak-anak, salah satunya: “Setiap ciuman yang diberikan orang tua kepada anaknya mendapatkan ganjaran tempat tertentu di surga.”

Dalam tujuh tahun pertama kehidupannya, seorang anak harus diperlakukan laksana tuan atau majikan (yang harus dilayani, ditaati, dan ditolerir semaksimal mungkin karena tahapan ini merupakan tahap pemeliharaan), sedangkan selama tujuh tahun kedua (berusia 7 hingga 14 tahun) ia sudah dapat dibimbing dan diarahkan bagai hamba (karena pada periode ini ia sudah menyerap penalaran logis serta teori-teori abstrak dan merasa tertarik untuk mengetahui segalanya), dan kemudian pada tujuh tahun ketiga (14 hingga 21 tahun) — yakni tatkala di usia remaja (pikiran menjadi kuat dan kedewasaannya mulai membuka wawasan pengetahuan yang luas) — ia laksana menteri yang mulai bisa diberi peran atau pelibatan (dikondisikan) sebagai asisten dan pemberi masukan atau saran.

Dalam  sebuah Hadits disebutkan bahwa Rasulullah Saww membandingkan anak-anak dengan bunga, yang sangat lembut dan peka, sehingga memerlukan kecermatan (ketelatenan) untuk mengasuhnya. Ada lagi Hadits lainnya — yang diriwayatkan para Imam Ahlul bait (Imam-imam dari Keluarga Suci Rasulullah Muhammad Saww) — yang menyebutkan bahwa perilaku yang pantas kepada anak-anak dapat mengakibatkan pertumbuhan mereka berlangsung baik dan akan menjadi pribadi-pribadi terpuji yang   memperlakukan sesamanya juga dengan pantas.

Dalam hubungan itu, Rasulullah Saww dan para Imam Ahlul Bait mengajarkan agar setiap orang tua perlu meluangkan waktu untuk senantiasa bermain dengan anak-anak mereka dengan beradaptasi dalam kehidupan (dunia) kanak-kanak, karena hal itu akan dapat membantu anak-anak menerima/mencerap perasaan dan pelajaran (bimbingan) yang sangat bermanfaat  bagi diri  mereka sendiri maupun lingkungan sosialnya. Terkait dengan ini Rasulullah Saww bersabda, “Dalam lingkungan anak-anak, bersikaplah (beradaptasilah) seperti anak-anak.”

Sementara itu Imam ‘Ali  karramallahu  wajhah  mengatakan, “Siapa pun yang mengasuh  anaknya harus menempatkan diri (beradaptasi) dalam dunia kanak-kanak.”  Beliau (Imam ‘Ali  alaihissalam) juga menasehatkan agar orang tua senantiasa mencium anaknya karena hal itu akan mendatangkan “Rahmah” (Kasih Sayang Allah).

Lebih lanjut, para Imam Ahlul Bait — termasuk Imam ‘Ali a.s — menasehatkan agar orang tua memberikan kasih sayang dan perhatian yang besar kepada anak-anak mereka, misalnya (dari hal yang dianggap sepele) dengan mengucapkan salam terlebih dahulu (lebih awal) kepada anak-anak mereka atau menjawab salam dengan ramah, dan menunjukkan penghargaan (yang disertai ketulusan), sehingga membuat anak-anak merasa dicintai/disayangi, diperhatikan, dan dihargai.

Selain itu diriwayatkan pula bahwa Rasulullah Saww selalu menyambut hangat/ramah anak-anak  dan memperlihatkan kasih sayang serta perhatian kepada mereka; bahkan beliau sering bermain bersama anak-anak, baik terhadap anak-anak beliau sendiri (yakni puteri beliau, Sayyidah Fâthimah az-Zahrah r.a, sepupu beliau Saydina ‘Ali a.s, kemudian cucu-cucu beliau: Saydina Hasan a.s dan Saydina Husein a.s, dan lain-lain)  maupun anak-anak orang lain. Dan hal itu sungguh merupakan contoh terbaik dan indah. Rasulullah Saww juga mengajarkan agar jangan sekali-kali mengejek (merendahkan/meremehkan) anak-anak, terutama terkait dengan perilaku kekanak-kanakan mereka, dan tidak membiarkan mereka menganggap diri bodoh (tidak memiliki kemampuan).

Kita juga dinasehatkan agar tidak terlalu berlebihan membatasi anak dan tidak selalu mencampuri urusan/aktivitas mereka dengan perintah-perintah yang tidak tepat, apalagi yang berupa omelan atau cercaan/celaan, karena menurut para Imam Ahlul Bait, hal demikian bukanlah perilaku terpuji, dan justru dapat mengakibatkan anak-anak menjadi keras kepala (sejak masa remaja mereka). [**]

Catatan:

Rasulullah Muhammad Saww bersabda: “Anak adalah majikan selama 7 tahun (tahapan pertama); dan hamba selama 7 tahun berikutnya (tahapan kedua), dan kemudian ia menjadi menteri selama 7 tahun (tahapan ketiga). Maka, bila ia menunjukkan sifat yang baik pada usia 21 tahun, ia adalah anak yang  baik; kalau tidak, tinggalkanlah ia (terutama jangan perlakukan lagi seperti majikan), karena bila engkau masih memeliharanya (memanjakannya) pada usia 21 tahun, berarti engkau telah melemparkan tanggung jawabmu kepada Allah.”

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Diterjemahkan dan diedit dari http://mahjubah.com/article_1960_0.html oleh Wa Ode Zainab Zilullah Toresano dan Tim Penerjemah (www.sorotparlemen.com, Selasa, 22/9/2015).

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